Tag: loneliness

January was a real tough month for me. I realized that I hate the weather this time of the year around here. It was cloudy and cold, and I barely saw the sun. Everything looked gloomy and dreary, which only added to my already feelings.

Sat, 1/14/23 – Loneliness

I don’t choose to be lonely but I accept it as a part of my life.

My loneliness is not because I’m physically alone. I have a tight-knit small circle of my family and friends who are always there for me, listening, caring, encouraging, supporting, understanding and sharing great times with me. Though I have these wonderful people in my life, no one, even my man makes me feel connected heart and soul. There’s always a piece of myself feeling isolated.

I’m glad for those who are able to find a fulfilling connection with their family, children or friends. But being incompletely connected with anyone is not necessarily a tragic thing. Maybe I was born to be lonely as my fate is to be only bonded with myself. But honestly, I accept loneliness because I understand it’s not easy to meet someone on this chosen solitary path. If I had chosen a different route, my life would probably be more fun and joyful. Unfortunately, I couldn’t persuade myself to give up and take an easier life.

Fri, 1/20/23 – Fat removal injection

S bought a set of syringes and drugs on Amazon so he could inject himself in order to “permanently” get rid of the fat under his chin. I don’t believe using unnatural measures to improve one’s appearance is healthy.” I’m concerned about the long-term safety and the possibility that he would become dependent on it forever. Also, I’m wondering if it has any possible impact on male fertility.

Sat, 1/21/23 – Ending a social connection

I met her at an art course and she was very nice. We started texting occasionally and hung out for coffee a few times. We talked for hours, shared personal stories and laughs and I expected a friendship between us. Later, I dropped the course and we lost touch for a while. Then, a few months afterwards, I reached out to her and we started catching up again. But our connection was pretty on and off. One time, I called her but she didn’t answer, which was understandable since not everyone is available for an unexpected call. I left her a message explaining that I was feeling down and wanted to talk. She texted me back, saying she was busy at the moment but would text me the next day to arrange a meetup with me and she said she loved to “lift my spirits up”. But it has been almost a month and I still haven’t received her text. I have tried to reach her twice when I needed her which I think is enough and I won’t bother her any more. The silence between us is an end for our acquaintanceship. She is still a sweet and friendly person though.

Tue, 1/24/23 – Zero copay policy

I received a medical bill for my recent doctor visit which I didn’t think I had to pay as I have a zero copay insurance policy. Questioned this with an insurance advocate, I was explained that the bill was for an “office visit”, not an annual checkup, which is eligible for zero copay. Annual check-ups are usually with a primary care physician, not a specialist like the one I saw.

Wed, 1/25/23 – Stock loss

A guy I know has lost a ton of money – $250k to be exact. Unfortunately, a large chunk of that was his parents’ savings they had given him to deposit it in a bank for interest. However, he went all-in on stocks and ended up losing everything. There’s even a rumor that he owes money to his company. It’s crazy, I feel so bad for him and his family because $250k is a real fortune for them. I hope this will be a tough lesson for him on controlling his impulses and he won’t never make this mistake again.

Thur, 1/26/23 – Missing yoga card

I’ve been looking everywhere but I can’t find one missing yoga card. How disappointing! I like the set of yoga cards a lot. It is a Christmas gift from my sister-in-law and I use it almost everyday when I practice yoga. The set has three options for practice: relaxation, mobility and energy. Each one has a series of poses and each pose is illustrated in one card that is numbered and easy to follow. It also tells you the level of complexity for each pose, from basic to advanced. Though I remember what the pose is in the missing card, I am still upset because I really love this set.